Well, it’s been a minute since I’ve given an update last. Unfortunately, not a terrible amount has happened. I have not been on another date with Hannah since we went to Benihana. She has become less and less enthusiastic about our dating as far as I can tell. Just the other day, I had to give her a bit of a concerning our relationship. I will post message and reply here:
Me: “
Hey, I’ve been thinking (a dangerous past time, I know! 😂). I’ve really enjoyed our conversations together for the past few months but I’m curious about how you see our relationship progressing. I will be honest and say that the main reason I’m dating through Mutual is primarily for marriage. I might have failed to make that a prevalent in our initial conversations.
I think the distance between each other and the cold weather has made it a little harder to get out and meet face to face. I enjoy the outdoors and love going off-roading! I know I’ve brought up going to Antelope Island before. Maybe we can do something like that sometime?
Do you have any questions that you haven’t had the chance to ask me yet?
Sorry if this came across as abrupt but it’s been on my mind for a minute and I didn’t quite know how to bring it up. No rush for a response, take your time and consider! 😁
Hannah:
Thinking is quite the dangerous past time lol, and thanks so much for giving me time to think on this, it was very reassuring and helpful. I’ve also enjoyed our conversations and dates! But I think similarly, I’ve also felt a bit stuck in not knowing what to do next or when, so I do appreciate you bringing it up!
Idk if we talked about it much, but I did assume marriage was your primary reason for dating, as it is mine too. I know I mentioned before that I’m a bit slower with relationships, so while marriage is the goal, I’ve found that committing to a relationship in the first place is a bit daunting for me cause it almost feels like I’m committing to a future marriage already, and that’s not a conversation I’d be ready to have for a while. I think for right now, I would like a bit more time to think on it and keep up the casual dates as we have been, but revisit this in a few weeks or so if that works for you?
As for questions, again, thank you for checking! There’s one thing that’s been on my mind that I haven’t known how to bring up either, but I guess I just wanted to know where you’re at in the gospel and/or where you want to be with it? I know we don’t talk about church stuff too much, but I think it’s made me realize that that is something I would want to be open about with someone I date, so I’d love to chat about that if you’re open to it. I know that’s a bigger question though, so if you want to call sometime or wait till we can meet up, that’s totally fine! Did you have any questions for me?
I do agree that the distance and cold have made it difficult to meet up though. I remember you bringing up Antelope Island, and I think it’d be fun! If it’s warm enough, maybe we could go sometime in the next couple of weeks, and if not, we could always meet up again in Salt Lake in the meantime. 😁
Me:
Of course! To be honest, I was actually expecting you to take more time, so I’m grateful you already thinking about it!
I’m glad we were on the same track then! Believe it or not, there’s a lot of people on dating apps nowadays that aren’t actually looking for a partner, but rather friendships. Kind of defeats, the purpose of the app but I digress. You did mention before that you were a bit slower with relationships, and I am totally fine with that! I even mentioned that I will go as slow or quick as you like, but I just wanted to make sure we were on the same path. I’d be glad to revisit it whenever you like!
That’s a good question! We haven’t really talked about it before, but it makes sense from your perspective. I see that you are really gospel centered, and I’m sure you would be going to the temple every week! 😁
I may have mentioned to you before, but I am a member of the bishopric of my ward, abet just a clerk, and I am worthy to go to the temple. My family has been in the church for literal generations, I think my second great grandfather was part of Brigham Young’s council at some point? I have found that my relationship with the church and gospel is a bit different from others, but everybody has their own unique way of worshiping. I love the church and its teachings, but I personally have a hard time feeling the spirit sometimes. It is something that I have been working on personally for a while. In fact, this is actually a topic that I’ve thought about in the past, one of my main goals in a relationship is finding someone who is more spiritually inclined than I am. I think it comes down to my logical, scientific mind. Unfortunately, I don’t think I have a natural gift of Faith like some others in my family. I would love to know your thoughts about this and the gospel as well!
I don’t think I have any particular questions for you at the moment. I think we seem to be very compatible personally wise and have similar communication styles. I can definitely let you know if I have any though! And by the way, you don’t ever have to worry about asking me any questions, I’ll answer anything you have if you don’t know when to ask. 😁
Hannah:
Thanks again, it is really reassuring to hear you’re okay with things moving a bit slower. I’ll think on things some more and reach out when I’m ready to revisit it, but definitely feel free to bring it up yourself if anything comes up for you too!
Thanks so much for your thoughtful answer! I know the question was a bit abrupt, but I really appreciate you being willing to talk about it. For me, I’m not super loud about my faith, but it has always been a core part of my life. I guess the reason I specified asked where you’re at and where you want to be with the gospel is because I think it’s so important to have goals and desires in mind in life, but especially when it comes to the gospel and living a Christ-centered life. In my life, I feel like there’s a lot I do well in in regards to church, but a lot more that I fall short on, or am trying to improve, so I’ve come to realize that I both want to be a support in a relationship to improve in the gospel, and to receive that support as well to push me closer to where I want to be. So it’s comforting for me to see that you’ve noticed and acknowledged where you want to be better in the gospel. 😊 Thanks for obliging me with the question!
Sounds good! And thanks for the reassurance, I tend to be an overthinker at times so hearing straight from you that you don’t mind the questions helps a lot. Definitely feel free to bring things up as well whenever! How’s your week been going btw?
Me:
I would agree with you. I am not super loud with my faith too. I kind of think that ones religious relationship is kind of a sacred thing and doesn’t necessarily need to be pushed on others. Goals and desires are extremely important! So is gratitude. I have a notepad on my desk and anytime I think of something that I am grateful for or have the fortune to enjoy, I will write it down so that I can remember.
I am happy to hear that you both want to give and receive support. I definitely feel the same way! That kind of attitude is what keeps families strong together! 😁 and the pleasure is all mine! 😉
Yep, I totally understand. I think I mentioned before that I’m a bit of an Overthinker sometimes too!
My week has been going alright. 😅 Just getting over my sickness today. I also went to the dentist this morning and apparently I’ve been a naughty boy because I had two cavities! Had those filled and now my jaw is super sore. My second job picked up again for a bit and I’ve been doing a little bit extra side work.
Although her reply was good, this was four days ago, and she hasn’t replied since. I do think that we are compatible towards each other, but I think her inexperience with dating, and her young age is affecting the development of a relationship.