Mindblown: a blog about philosophy.
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Feeling content
I am writing this sitting in my Jacuzzi in the backyard at 25°. I don’t know if I have written in this journal yet about the Jacuzzi that I built, but the house that I rent doesn’t allow bodies of water bigger than a bathtub. I went to tractor supply and bought a fiberglass horse…
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Christmas Day
All right, I’m pretty sure I see this in every journal that I write but it’s been a few months since I have made an entry. Since my last entry, I had a total of six dates with Kylie, then she started the winter semester and cut contact with me. I wasn’t all that hurt…
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I have come to the realization that I tend to come to my journal, normally when I’m sad. Unfortunately, such is the case tonight. I don’t really know why. I’m sitting out in my backyard in my homebuilt Jacuzzi just thinking. Not really about anything in particular, just thinking. I think I am subconsciously worrying…
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Impostor Syndrome
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]So, I have come to the conclusion that I have a bit of a problem accepting compliments and praise. Now, this wasn’t a sudden realization, I have always known this. Throughout my life, I have always felt just a tinge inadequacy in what I do; which is why even minor criticism in my work always…
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Fun Day
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]Bryce, Sarah and I had a fun day of activities today! They milked the cows this morning and then we went out to meet Evelyn in Provo for a meal at cupbop. Afterwards, we toured the Orem Honda Powersports dealership. Evie went home afterwards and them we when to Sarah’s parents house for her brother…
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A Light Touch
Today I went to Maverik’s Lake Day event. I rode the jet skis with a few people but I also rode tandem with Mariela. I don’t think I have written about Mariela here yet but she was a girl that I worked with on Maverik’s triage team about 5 years ago and liked me then.…
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Validation!
Ever since I started my QA position and Maverik, I have always felt a little self-conscious. Feel like I haven’t done very much during my one year tenure there, and have always felt a little singled out by Sam McCurdy, the senior manager of the engineers. I applied many times for engineering positions, and was…
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Third date with Kylie
I’m sitting at Nori sushi at 9 pm right after my third date with Kylie. We went to the BYU life sciences museum and I actually had a good time but in sitting here a little distraught at the moment. I enjoyed Kylie’s presence tonight but I am not feeling a spark. I’ve often been…
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Longing for Touch
I am sitting at home alone tonight feeling a little lonely. I realize that it has been a very, very long time since I was last touched in a way that felt loving. The only thing that I’m wishing for at the moment is for someone to just sit here and hold my hand. That…
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A First Second Date
[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]Well, it’s been a minute since I updated last but I just had a second date with a girl named Kylie that I met on mutual. On our first date, we went to the BYU botany pond and the BYU creamery. We spoke about our missions, family camping trips and touched on video games at…
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